Bottom

Child sex trafficking, in your backyard

Child sex trafficking undoubtedly exists in your community.

In 2013, blank slate theatre (where I served as Artistic Director for 11 years) collaborated with Interfaith Children’s Advocacy Network to write and produce a play on child sex trafficking, entitled Bottom. I got to work with uncommonly talented teenage artists to help bring this heartbreaking story to the stage. The live production featuring all-youth casts toured around the Midwest for four years.

Bottom centers on Amber, a (fictional) former prostitute who was groomed into her pimp’s ring at the age of 11. Amber remained in the ring into her adulthood, ultimately defecting and sharing her story during a long day at the station with law enforcement.

Below is a selection from the script of Bottom. It is a synthesis of Amber’s story into a monologue. I will forever be inspired by the brave and brilliant actors (Simone Williams, Emma Schlader, Jesica Springer, Eponine diatta) who brought Amber to life for thousands of audience members.

[Scene: AMBER in police station, speaking to police detectives about what she may know about a lost child in their city].

AMBER. I always wanted outta this lifestyle. Never liked anything about it. I was brainwashed, so I saw the lifestyle as prestigious, glamorous - people liked me, I had men coming from all around to see me. I was able to buy my friends, people worshipped me. I always wanted outta this lifestyle, and now that I’m outta this lifestyle … I find myself ... missing it.

These guys, pimps, they’re geniuses. They can literally control your mind. They re-organize your thinking, re-organize your feelings, re-organize your values – they turn you against your family and friends, and they do anything to keep you vulnerable so they can have power over you. My pimp, Dion, would drive girls far away from home to places they weren’t familiar with just to make them more vulnerable. One day, when I was first starting out with Dion, he got me high, put me in his van, and said “I’m taking you somewhere you can’t talk to any of your family and you won’t know where you are.” Let’s just say I know more about Ely, Minnesota than I ever thought I would.

You might be thinking he abused me physically. He never laid a finger on me. He started to beat some of the others girls toward the end of my time, but he never beat me. I thought he was providing protection for me, but it was a false sense of protection. I see that now. More than anything it was the psychological shit he put me through. He emotionally beat my feelings out of me. And at the time I was so vulnerable that any kind of attention, even the emotional abuse, felt like heaven. I see all that now. There was no protection whatsoever. TV and music make it seem like pimps are these violent villains with guns who chain up their girls and torture them - that wasn’t Dion. At least at first. Dion presented himself very well. He was well-mannered, he rarely yelled, he doesn’t smoke, he doesn’t do drugs, he doesn’t drink.

No one – I mean no one dreams of becoming a prostitute! No one dreams of this lifestyle! No little girl when asked in elementary school what she wants to be when she grows up says, “Mrs. Anderson, I want to be a prostitute.” When I was eight years old I was raped by a neighbor a block away from my house, and when I was eleven, when our house was in foreclosure, my mother sold me into Dion’s ring.

People use the term “forced prostitution” to describe sex trafficking rings. But calling it “forced prostitution” is bullshit, don’t you fucking call it forced prostitution, that’s bullshit, that’s — that’s redundant. No one choses this lifestyle, it’s always forced. Prostitution is always forced, no one chooses this.

I got so tired of wearing so many faces, so many hats, so many masks. For sixteen years everyday I was asking men the question, “Who would you like me to be?” I never once asked myself who I’d like to be. And I for sure never asked God who he’d like me to be.

You asked earlier how I got out? I’m not out. You never get out. Dion might not have my body, my work anymore, but he’ll always have me, he’ll always own me.… own what matters most, that is.

(Bottom at blank slate theatre was first written and performed in 2013 in Saint Paul, Minnesota, and had its final performance in Two Harbors, Minnesota in 2017)

This blog entry from Adam Arnold, MA, LMFT, LADC is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute the practice of medicine, psychology, mental health counseling, chemical health counseling, spiritual or religious guidance, or other professional health care services, including the giving of medical advice, and no provider/patient relationship is formed. The use of the content provided by Arnold is at the participant’s own risk. The content of this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Participants should not disregard, or delay in obtaining, medical advice for any medical condition they may have, and should seek the assistance of their health care professionals for any such conditions.